Nevada: For One Night Only... Geechy Guy!

There is no mistaking the Utah-Nevada border. Within five feet of the border, the casinos begin: the first one you pass in Wendover (rhymes with: "Grab Your Ankles and Grit Your Teeth") is the exotic Montego Bay Resort. As you can see from the picture, it makes the Rio in Vegas look classy. The picture is a bit blurry, but that's appropriate, as my vision has been in a similar state ever since walking through this casino. I think my visual cortex has been addled.

Full disclosure: I lost $5 in 30 seconds in a slut--er, slot.

At least Celine Dion is not playing here.

Buy your tickets now: Three Dog Night is coming!