Last week, Louisiana Governero Bobby Jindal provided the Republican response to President Obama's address to Congress. Despite his status as a Republican "rising star," Jindal's performance was roundly panned as stale, inauthentic, and nihilistic. Oh, and he may have reminded many Americans of a likable yet dimwitted television character. Mission accomplished, Bobby!
But wait, it gets worse. Yesterday, a spokesperson for Jindal admitted that the governor completely fabricated the central anecdote of his speech: a story about his heroic anti-bureaucratic actions during Hurricane Katrina. Oops! Jindal had used the story to make a point about how government often stands in the way of the solutions to problems (solutions like, you know, saving people from rising flood waters). Maybe so, but do you know what probably does even less than government to save people from rising floodwaters? Fictional heroism! Heckuva job, Bobby!
All of which raises an important question for Fosco: what else has Bobby Jindal been lying to us about? With a little digging, Fosco has managed to compile a list:
- Real first name is not Bobby.
- Actually not the Governor of Louisiana, but the Lieutenant Governor.
- Wife was not "Miss Teen Louisiana"; rather, was "Mr. Teen Louisiana."
- Claimed to prefer Hosea's gumbo, but actually preferred Stefan's gumbo.
- Criticized the stimulus bill for containing a MagLev train between Disneyland and Las Vegas. Train is not mentioned in bill and is only one of many potential projects that may request high-speed rail funding.
- Is the biological father of Sarah Palin's baby.
- Did not actually give his speech from Louisiana's Governor's Mansion, but in front of a green screen in Tom Selleck's poolhouse.
- Has never managed the Jonas Brothers.
- Pretended to be terminally ill so as to get a visit from Joe Namath.
- Is actually wearing his father's suit.
- Cannot watch The Muppets Take Manhattan without sobbing uncontrollably.
- Secretly doubts whether all women who have abortions are godless whores.
- Real middle name: Hussein.
[Commenters: Did I miss anything?]
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6 comments:
Peabody and Emmy award-winning journalist Dan Rather has articulated that he believes that the account has never conclusively been proven to be false — and that even if the account is false, that the underlying story is true.
The BeeMaster
Well, that's well and good for Dan Rather, but there is still the matter of Jindal's own spokesperson "clarifying" that the exchange did not take place _during_ Katrina and that Sheriff Lee was not actually talking to a "bureaucrat" at the time, but rather a reporter.
Not to mention that just because GWB's government couldn't (wouldn't?) save people from drowning, that doesn't mean a different government wouldn't respond effectively and appropriately. Pretending that all government is as poorly managed and badly prepared as GWB's government is silly. In the next natural disaster, you can hope for friendly neighbors with fishing boats; instead, I'm going to hope for a FEMA chief who bothers to organize the Coast Guard and Air National Guard.
As for the suggestion that"even if the account is false, [...] the underlying story is true"--that looks to me like a textbook case of truthiness.
I wasn't defending BFL (big fat liar) Governor Jindal, nor was I slamming Dan Rather (who can't be slammed any more than he already has been). I was more mocking anyone who would defend BFL Jindal based upon:
1) He's their Republican/conservative/anti-Obama guy and will defend him even though he is a BFL or
2) (the Dan Rather thing) Even though it was a BFL, it supports an underlying truth/belief (that bureaucracy is bad).
A lie is a lie, even if you like the guy or what he represents. (I had never heard of the guy before, so I don't have a dog in that fight)
If this were an impromptu utterance, you could give the guy the benefit of the doubt. But it was scripted as part of a quasi-official nationally addressed rebuttal and he should have known better. Perhaps he thought he could get away with such a Biden-esque statement because the subject, Sheriff Harry Lee, has since passed away. This would only make Governor Jindal a despicable BFL.
What should happen to Jindal? I suppose this doesn't "rise to the level" of impeachment or anything. Unless he told the story under oath, of course, because THAT would be an impeachable... oh, wait. I guess not. I suppose we should all just MoveOn...
As for even suggesting that Bush or his administration deliberately "wouldn't" save people from drowning, you need to quit getting your current events briefings from Kanye.
Computer simulations of a Katrina-strength hurricane had estimated a worst-case-scenario death toll of more than 60,000 people in Louisiana. The actual number was 1077 in that state.
Finally, good luck hoping "...for a FEMA chief who bothers to organize the Coast Guard and Air National Guard" as FEMA has jurisdiction over neither.
The BeeMaster
Finally, good luck hoping "...for a FEMA chief who bothers to organize the Coast Guard and Air National Guard" as FEMA has jurisdiction over neither.
Well played, BeeMaster. I give.
Best content & valuable as well. Thanks for sharing this content.
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